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Topic ClosedWording glitches in some in-game texts

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GM Luna View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02 Nov 2012 at 14:59
Thank you for helping us proofread. ;) 

Petitions won't be necessary. This is fine. 

Luna
GM Luna | Illyriad Community Manager | community@illyriad.co.uk

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Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02 Nov 2012 at 13:38
I considered them so low-priority that I didn't want to clutter the petition system with them - if they get picked up here, that'll be great. If they go unnoticed here, meh, I'll live.

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Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Nov 2012 at 22:03
If you haven't already I would suggest that you fill out some petitions. These grammatical errors and misspellings are considered low priority as far as petition ranking goes, so I wouldn't expect an answer anytime soon.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Nov 2012 at 22:02
Sure enough, the web-form did interpret the character entities; the just-in-case version of the "Miner&#39s Guild" is what I actually see in the browser-tab as page title.

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Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Nov 2012 at 21:43
Ceramic Magic completion mail: "... he is happy to drop of a hefty pouch of coins ..." that use of "of" should be "off" !

Miner's Guild, Skinner's Guild, etc. (any building with an apostrophe in its name); if I select the building, my browser tab displays its name in the title bar; and you've used ' instead of a plain old apostrophe - which really is the legitimate semantics of ' in ASCII - so I see "Miner's Guild" in my title bar instead of "Miner's Guild". (Just in case this web-form digests character codes; that's "Miner&#39;s Guild", with the "ampersand hash thirty-nine" clearly visible.)

Tormand information mail: on the legend's surrounding the founding of the mine, the mail says "Their story has many fanciful details about wresting mountain trolls and securing the land by ..." and I can believe "wresting" (with no ell in it) the land from its former owners involved "wrestling" (with an ell in it) some of them, but I think you have a typo ! Your spell-checker didn't spot it because the error leaves a valid word, just not the right one to use here.

A Herd Day's Night (2/2) Completed: Gregor pays "with 6 of his best heads of cattle" - I'm fairly sure rural usage of "head" would phrase that as "with 6 head of his best cattle" - as if cattle were a continuous resource rather than a discrete one, and "head" doesn't go to a plural. Ask an actual farmer or stockman, though. (Alternatively, "with 6 of his best cattle" is definitely just fine.)

Foundry, Kiln, Carpentry: "Increasing the efficiency [...] will see a steady increase in [resource] production at the rate of 2% per hour per level." If only that were literally true ! Increasing it by 2% (not per hour, just one-off) means increasing the hourly production by 2% of what I'm producing each hour; the rate of production is in units/hour, so 2% of it is also in units/hour; doing that *each hour* would be a rate of *acceleration* of production. [If a vehicle's speed is increasing at 10% per hour, on a base speed of 10 km/hr, then it's accelerating at 1 km/hr/hr; the speed is 10 km per hour, 10% of it is thus 1 km per hour; 10% *per hour* of it is thus 1 km/hr/hr, an acceleration, not a one-off change in speed.] Say I'm producing the relevant resource at 100 units / hour; if I increase that by 2% (e.g. by having the relevant facility at level 1), I'll be producing at 102/hour. If I increase it by 2% *per hour* then, after the first hour, I'll have 102/hour; after the second 104/hour, after the third 106/hour, etc.; after fifty hours, I'll have doubled output, without even getting past level 1. You actually just mean that leveling up the facility increases production by 2% per level. Skip the "per hour" ! (... or change the phrasing to "at the rate of 2% of the hourly production per hour per level" ... nah.) There are similar spurious uses of "% per hour" elsewhere.

     Eddy.
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