When does aiding a smaller player cross the line into enabling that player to become complacent and think that all their Illy issues will be dealt with by others?
For example, several months ago, I helped a leader of a small alliance in a dispute with another player about city placement. I helped because the alliance leader didn't have military to defend himself or the alliance. At that time I advised the alliance leader to at least have troops to defend his own cities and preferably the alliance as well.
Fast forward a ways and that alliance leader is in the same position. Still no troops to defend itself from intruders and begging others for help. He is told to go ahead and remove the city, he didn't and didn't bother to find anyone to do it. Now the city is considerably larger, and they are sorry they didn't do it before. I am sorry I ever helped this player in the first place because I have enabled them to become complacent and that didn't help them in their game development; they learned nothing.
Where exactly is the fine line between helping and hindering? When I joined Illy and the alliance was attacked we took our tiny little armies and fought them off ourselves, I'm sure many of you have had the same experience. Are we making Illy better by our interference's or worse?